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December 29, 2006

Dumb Sports Quotes Of The Year

Now THIS is what I'm talking about. The sports media is a ripe target for assault (the humor kind, not the physical kind, although I reconsider whenever Sean Salisbury's on TV). In-touch sports fans recognize the idiots, sense the flip-floppers,...

Mike Tyson. That Says It All.

I want you to watch the video above and then tell me if you're surprised at all that Mike Tyson was arrested on DUI and cocaine possession charges early this morning. I'll spare you all of the effigies and...

December 28, 2006

Surprise! Tiki Barber's Thoughts Wander

Remember when Tiki Barber said he was going to retire after this season? And remember when people criticized Barber for announcing his retirement in the middle of the year, therefore casting a cloud over the Giants and providing a...

Canadians Can Be Un-Patriotic, Too

I'm a little late on this, but Off Wing Opinion tipped me off to this story about a Canadian junior hockey coach who was suspended when he cut a player who he thought wouldn't sign a Canadian flag meant for...

You Got Served: Shawne Merriman Edition

Here it comes. Jason Taylor sets down the boombox in front of Shawne Merriman, hits play.... Let's see you dance, sucka! You got nothin' on me! Peep the quote: "You really shouldn't be able to fail a test like...

December 27, 2006

Further Transportation Trouble For Fred Smoot

It hasn't been a great year for Fred Smoot. He was involved in the famous Vikings sex boat incident, in which he was accused of being a primary contributor to the debauchery. He was benched, despite making $6M a...

The Big Mistake

The Diamondbacks have confirmed their interest in reacquiring Randy Johnson from the Yankees. I'm at a loss for words. The Diamondbacks have built a corp of impressive young prospects and they've got money to spend. Why waste both on...

December 26, 2006

Happy Holidays

I hope everyone had happy and safe holidays. We'll be back tomorrow....

December 22, 2006

Duke Rape Charges Dropped

Remember that whole Duke rape thing? It was THE story of the world, both sporting and non-, and now finally it has breathed it's last, putrid, wimpering breath. Hopefully. Prosecutors have dropped the rape charges against the three Duke...

The Lost Art

You know, it's been a little too quiet in Raider land lately, and we're not just talking about Randy Moss' game. Ohh! Zing! I crack myself up sometimes. Adam Schefter, former Denver Post employee and current pundit for the...

Here's A Penny For Your Thoughts

This is sort of old news, but my mind isn't what it used to be and sometimes I forget basketball still exists. Forgive me. The Sonics worked out Penny Hardaway on Monday, and coach Bob Hill said Penny was...

December 21, 2006

The 2007 Perk Bowl

Jay Coulter, over at the mothership, has unearthed an interesting tidbit about all of these bowls that answers one of my biggest questions every winter: why can't college football switch to a playoff system? It doesn't exactly take a rocket...

Troy Smith Loves Strippers

I guess the natural response to the above headline is, "Well, who doesn't?" But The New York Post still manages to offer some interesting details about Smith's post-Heisman celebrations: Ohio State quarterback Troy Smith celebrated his Heisman Trophy by...

Mash 'Em Up

Here's the hot new mixtape burning up the Internet this morning: the Allen Iverson/Jim Mora mash-up video. Pretty good stuff, but could be better. First of all, it needs to be longer. Second, this mixtape needs to be fleshed...

December 18, 2006

Maybe Kornheiser Isn't So Smart After All

The Monday Night Football staff this year has been nothing but disappointing. I'm not disappointed with Joe Theismann, because I had no expectations for him to be anything more than awful. However, I was expecting Tony Kornheiser to be...

December 15, 2006

One More Friday Video

It's a bunch of refs getting what's coming to them. Enjoy the weekend, everyone! I'm about to go on a two-day bender....

Let's Laugh at Kids

I cannot thank good ol' Matt Ufford, of the outstanding With Leather, enough for this video. Plus, he's a Seahawk fan, so make sure to visit the site and offer your condolences regarding last night's embarassing self-destruction against the...

The Return of New Mexico

It's been buzzing around the Internet this morning, everywhere except, oddly, ESPN.com. Marcus Vick is in trouble again, and this time it's a doozy. A girl he's been linked to in the past is now suing him for $6.3M,...

December 13, 2006

New Coaching Staff, Different Players, Same Old Sorry Ass Rams

I'm a Rams fan. Unfortunately, I haven't really had the chance to write about my team here since they've been the definition of obscurity since Week 6. Fans of other teams see their team is playing the Rams and...

December 12, 2006

The Handshake

Man are those Red Sox slick. How's this for scheisty: the Red Sox won the bid for Daisuke Matsuzaka. You probably know this unless you've been living under David Ortiz's jock strap. They had a month to sign him...

Neverending Trade Talks

There are few constants in life. Death. Taxes. Trade rumors involving Allen Iverson and Manny Ramirez. Will the latter ever come true? It seems as if every year, Manny and AI are the center of their respective rumor circuits....

December 11, 2006

Can We Finally Forget This Mangini Nonsense?

I'm very happy for Jets fans. Their team has had a surprising, and truly good, season. But I was a bit miffed at the notion before this week's games that Eric Mangini was the leading candidate for Coach of...

December 8, 2006

Come Back, Scotty

Jerry Rice is like the Rolling Stones and Aerosmith: once great, arguably at the top of their game, but hung around way too long and made a joke out of themselves. On the other hand, Scott Stevens is Pavement,...

December 7, 2006

Culture of Winning?

I was at the Devils/Canadians game last night for work. Afterwards, I shimmied my way to the locker room to grab some quotes when I saw Zach Parise sitting alone -- the reporters hadn't fully made their way into...

December 6, 2006

PHEE-nom-in-AL

Say what you will about Mad TV, but Frank Caliendo does a mean impression. Here he is, absolutely nailing Jim Rome....

Is It Something In The Water?

The Atlantic Coast has great beaches, the best bagels and pizza in the country (if you live in New York/New Jersey), and the worst athletic competition you'll ever see. The NHL and NBA factions of the Atlantic used to be...

The Magic Is Gone

In the wake of our discussion of stupid baseball contracts this offseason, the Red Sox have gone and made the stupidest. They're going to wind up taking a giant step down from Manny Ramirez to J.D. Drew, and they're...

December 4, 2006

There Is No BCS Controversy This Year, But It Still Sucks

Sure, people out there are going to say that Michigan got robbed. But honestly, Florida vs. Ohio State is the way it should be. I'm no fan of the BCS. If D-II and D-III can have a playoff, why...

Tom Glavine Chooses (Settles For?) Mets

After what seemed like a good month, Tom Glavine finally signed a one-year, $10.5M contract with the Mets. Glavine was debating between the Mets, who he had his first really good year with just last season, and the Atlanta...

Lacy v. Tsypko Exercise in Boxing Basics

The Winky Wright v. Ike Quartey fight in Tampa was supposed to be the culmination of years of negotiations and ranking that finally brought together two of boxing’s best (albeit aging) middleweights. It was a fine fight that illustrated...

Schiano Better Stay

People from New Jersey have an inordinate sense of pride. It's an us vs. the world mentality in the Garden State. That's why I'll be pissed if Greg Schiano leaves Rutgers for Miami. Look, I could give a shit...

The Titans Are Getting Frisky

Say what you will, but the Titans are a fun team to keep an eye on right now. Left for dead early in the season and certainly DOA at the beginning of the season, Jeff Fisher's squad is turning...