Andy "Don't Call Me 'The Furminator'" Furman, a longtime sports radio personality on WLW in the 'Nati, has been fired after accusing T.J. Houshmandzadeh of being racist.
His claim? That Housh failed to make a scheduled appearance on his show, and that he also called Furman a "punk-ass white boy." So? What's so bad about that?
Listen, I know a lot of black people (there's that typical white person source of pride -- "Hey! I'm down! I have black friends!"). If I had a nickel each time one of them called me a punk-ass white boy, I'd have a million-fucking-dollars. It's a compliment! I'd rather that than, say, having them mug me. Because that's what black people do -- they either call you a punk-ass white boy or they mug you. Your choice.
In his own defense, Housh denies saying that, insisting he simply told Furman to "fuck himself."
The real bad-guy in this story? Clear Channel, who owns WLW radio. Of course they do! They're Clear Channel. They own everything. I wouldn't be surprised if they've got a share of the GloNo empire. Really, I don't know what they've done to deserve blame in this instance, but it's a pretty fool-proof method: all else fails, blame Clear Channel. I accidentally bit my tongue 10 minutes ago, and cursed that wretched empire.
Because I smell some hate email, let me just say that I was kidding above about black people. Seriously. I love black people -- as a matter of fact, I think everybody should own one. Oh, ZING! No, really, just kidding. Loosen up.