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Evgeni Malkin Will Eat Your Children

Pittsburgh phenom Evgeni Malkin, who's probably just relieved to be able to eat something other than potatos, is doing what some might consider really fucking good for the feisty Penguins so far this year.

Malkin has seven goals in his first six games, the longest career-starting scoring streak since 1917. He's part of the reason the Penguins are in first place in the division, only two months removed from talks linking the Penguins to such metropolii as Hamilton, Ontario and Portland, Oregon. It seems a hockey renaissance is now on its way to the Steel City.

With Malkin, Sidney Crosby, Jordan Staal, Marc-Andre Fleury, and a few other young guys, the Penguins have a scary young corp developing. Yes, you read that correctly. They're still too young and inexperienced to make a noteworthy playoff run this year, but they'll be in the dance and they only need one tough seven-game defeat to fuel championship hopes in 2008. Who would have thought the Penguins would win another championship before the Steelers?