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I Am Most Certainly Ready For Some Football

Yes, tonight is the night for football fans everywhere. I'll be counting tonight to hear how many times "Roethlisberger" is said, which should roughly be about 10,000,000, despite the fact that he's not playing. Still, if you can get past that, tonight should be a pretty good game. The Steelers will have hamstrung Hines Ward in the lineup, the Dolphins will be playing their first meaningful game with The Wildly Overrated Daunte Culpepper (official name) at quarterback. Both teams have playoff, no, CHAMPIONSHIP aspirations. Knowing this, both will probably miss the playoffs. The NFL works in crazy ways like that.

For all of your research and hype-building needs, I'll direct you to the Steelers Fanhouse and the Dolphins Fanhouse at AOL -- they'll be taking care of you all day leading until gametime. I'll be at work, but luckily the sports department has a nifty little TV that I'll make sure to check every, say, 15 seconds. It just means I'll have to watch the game in a sober haze, instead of a drunken one.

Enjoy the game tonight, everyone. We'll be back in the morning with analysis.